The crack team of journalists that comprise the cast of reality television show, Fox & Friends, are all over the latest, most pressing scoop. Why did Barack Obama mention God in his oval office oil address to the nation when he is, duh, a Jesus hating Muslim. Since he only goes to Christian church maybe once a month or something, you know, which is still better than 70% of “God fearing Americans”.

“I mean, him being a black muslim atheist, and a Democrat, and all, it just doesn’t make too much sense for him to be saying anything about God or Jesus. To Americans. On the TV. During a time of crisis.”

How disingenuous! Can we even be sure that Obama wasn’t being televised out of a mosque, with his terrorist BFF’s?

These fucking anchors are so outrageous and delusional that they literally just made scum bag, crybaby, conspiracy theorist Newt Gingrich seem like an alright guy.

You know what isn’t disingenuous though? John McCain’s compelling and deeply personal cross in the dirt story from when he was a prisoner in Vietnam. Doubt many people remember that, it being so true and unquestionable and all, since he’s a white Republican.

[Think Progress]

What better way to get your name really circling around the media echo chamber nowadays if you’re an insane Oath Keeper senate candidate than having a nice circle jerk on Fox & Friends ’stupidity in the morning’ hour? The newly crowned Tea Partying Mama Grizzly GOP candidate for Harry Reid’s senate seat, Sharron Angle, got just that opportunity this morning!

Boy, what an interview! Those hosts sure were prepared and had a whole lot of prior knowledge on the person who they were sitting right in front of. Just listen to those questions! A real whirlwind! Sharron Angle has no experience. Wrong. Sharron Angle was endorsed by human comedy routine, Sarah Palin. Wrong. Why are the hosts and producers of Fox & Friends such chronic idiots?

Regardless of this pitiful display, the decision to go on Fox & Friends and get pampered was still a much smarter decision than when Rand Paul decided to immediately go on Rachel Maddow’s Marxist Lesbian Secular Show after winning the nomination. Can I also say that from 0:09 to about 0:15 of this video is terrifying? The look on this lady’s faces will probably haunt everyone forever.

And here’s a link to a Fox affiliate trashing this piece of shit.

[Dave Weigel]

So here’s President Kill Whitey telling all of America — especially white small business owners — that they need to give him all their money, ASAP, because he has to give it to poor people and needs it for plane tickets so he can go help his terrorist buds, in Kenya, where he was born. Beck just plain loops the clip in the background while he spastically scribbles nonsense and numbers on DUAL chalkboards and bleeds out of his ears.

AND GOOD DAY TO YOU, SIIIIR.

Well I’m scared.  Impeach Obama?

Hmm, bailing out her child brat, Willow, from trouble after throwing what the kids like to call a BANGER RAGER and causing $20,000 to $30,000 in damage.

NATIONAL ENQUIRER HAS THE SCOOP:

“Willow has been running with the wrong crowd,” confides a friend. “They are a popular high school clique known as the Colony Girls, who are well known as hard partiers and are regularly involved in underage drinking and smoking dope.”

HAHA.  A dope smoking clan of rich girls known as the Colony Girls.  The kids broke into a house that was for sale and just ran A-FUCKING-MOK: breaking shit, leaving vodka and orange juice jugs all over the damn place, and having sex on everything.

And then, because Sarah Palin is Sarah Palin, powerful, etc. she has a secret meeting with the something-or-other law enforcement people and all charges against the girls are dropped.  The boys involved are still fucked.  Justice. *raises clenched fist*

What else…  Oh, Sarah’s got a new show coming to Fox?  Real American Stories.  Jesus Christ, why can’t that title be a joke?  No, seriously, Jesus Christ, please answer this question.  This show consists of lying to the viewers and pretending that the interviews they are showing are recent or relevant to the context of the show.  Which they are not.  Interviewees include LL Cool J and Toby Keith.

Wait, nevermind.  Seems Fox never actually told them what the interviews were for or who they were going to be used by.  LL Cool J first explained via his own personal blog site, Twitter, that he was not OK with scum-shit Sarah Palin using him for anything.  Toby Keith then did the same thing.  His overpaid PR guy released this statement:

We were never contacted by Fox. I have no idea what interview it’s taken from. They’re promoting this like it’s a brand new interview. He never sat down with Sarah Palin.

This leaves the show with interviews of teabaggers humping Support Our Troops signs and yelling incoherently.

Why does Sarah Palin hate everything except herself, including America?

[Gawker/National Enquirer/TPM]

Guess it wasn’t as important as that plane right there landing perfectly with no evidence that anything was seriously wrong.  OK. *puts head through closet door, smiling.*

[Media Matters]

HAHA.  Why is Megyn Kelly so stupid and why does she enjoy shouting her stupidity out loud to other people around her?

“DOES ANYBODY UNDERSTAND WHAT’S HAPPENING EVEN AFTER THIS LAME MAN EXPLAINED IT TO US QUITE SUCCINCTLY?!”  The guy even added in a nice conservative flare to his explanation.

MEGYN KELLY DOESN’T CARE THOUGH.  She even went to Law School and practiced for NINE YEARS.  This is clearly all too confusing and Megyn Kelly and everyone are disgusted that all of the Democratic leadership hasn’t come to their houses and explained to them, person by person, what is in this bill and how they’re going to pass it.

(is college so horrible now that even after years of law school it is possible to not understand basic things?)

(did Megyn Kelly suck her way through law school?)

[Media Matters]

The whole interview was sort of sad to be honest.  You know that the people at Fox and their viewers would have publicly castrated Bret if he didn’t ask the questions that matter most to them.  All of the dumb ones.  And thus, that is all he asked.  Lots and lots of dumb questions.  He also showed his superiority to African Americans by constantly cutting off the President mid sentence like a very polite person would.

EHH, overall was pretty boring viewing.  Majority of the focus was on, of course, process.  And how SO MANY AMERICANS care about the complete and utter unconstitutional practices of these slimy liberals in Congress.

Highlights include multiple looks of disdain towards Bret from Obama, a few mocking laughs, and watching a white guy apologize to a black guy.

He will certainly lose his sex organs for this.

You can watch the interview in its 16 minute entirety here.

Footage after the jump.part 1:

part 2:

part 3:  Interview doesn’t resume until 2:40

“Alright, that was President Obama answering some very good questions, quite rudely may I add.  We’re gonna cut away now because he’s terrible and a turd just came out of my butt.”

[Media Matters]

And then after seeing the Glenn Beck interview all those thoughts went away.  Now, Beck can hold a pretty solid interview so he didn’t let her stray too much but that only goes so far considering the path he kept her on is, uhh, the typical Glenn Beck path.  Some points of interest:

John McCain’s a progressive.

“It’s a scary thing that people would be willing to lose their seat over passing a piece of legislation.”  -Palin

After citing “the polls” as a reference for the changing perspective in America, she later played off the most admired people in America list as something she can’t take too much stock in since it’s just a “poll”.

Sarah Palin was scared she may be asked some question regarding the statue of liberty so she had her son Google random facts about it to prepare her.

Glenn Beck’s southern hick impersonation is horrible.

Beck still thinks that Sarah Palin is the Governor of Alaska.

Sarah Palin would love to go back to the old times and just raise her family in Wasilla and do the Alaska things that people from Alaska like to do, but she trucks on because she needs to lead.  And that is why her speaking fees range up to $100,000.

Sarah’s favorite food is steak.

But the highlight of the interview?!  BOOM:

Eerily familiar.

If you’re interested in seeing the entire interview the here’s a link to part 1.

CAUTION. YOU are about to enter THE no spin zone.

[NYT]

If you’re planning on having an affair anytime soon do yourself a favor and pre-convert that way you’re good and ready for the forgiveness and redemption phase.

The exploitation is not so much of the family members themselves, who would harbor the same feelings and opinions regardless of Hannity’s forum. Rather, Hannity is exploiting the empathy that millions of viewers hold for those victims. By stoking their sadness, and providing no counterbalance from grieving victims with alternate views, Hannity creates pure propaganda.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Guy at 5:08, I feel for you, I really do, but drawing a comparison like that is kind of ridiculous.

[Daily Dish]

Some clips released by Microsft:

Click here to view the embedded video.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Click here to view the embedded video.