A Republic! That’s the form of government we have, right here in America! Those of us that believe in this form of government — 11% or so, since last checking? — are commonly referred to as republicans (small r). But you know what people are also called republicans, but with a big-case R? Crass, ignorant degenerates like Sarah Palin and Newt Gingrich, and also an entire half of modern American politics. That’s why The Swedish Republican Association, whose goal is to abolish the country’s monarchy, and which is made up of the country’s left-leaning parties, are considering a name change. (more…)
On 08.26.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
On 08.19.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
If you missed Laura Schlessinger’s, um — uncalled for? — yeah, uncalled for rant towards some black lady that called in to her show who was upset that her white husband’s friends and family were always making black jokes and whatever, here it is.
As you can see, it was a very nice, and DOCTOR like, thing to say to someone. If I was a doctor and some black person came to me for help I’d probably cast them out as some hypersensitive asshole and yell the N word at them over and over again also. So would Sarah Palin. She is sooo tired of the laaamedick media making all these claims of racism. Laura Schlessinger isn’t a racist, you silly liberals. She is just exercising her first amendment right: to be able to say whatever incredibly crude and disrespectful thing that she wants to on the radio, offend lots of people, and not have a bunch of her sponsors drop her. How UNJUST. (Here’s Laura’s announcement that she is leaving her show, because America sucks.)
On 08.17.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
Watch now as a group of abortion enthusiasts/furries of Emily’s List do a slightly disturbing thing to make fun of giant piece of human trash, Sarah Palin, by putting on bear suits and growling at a camera. I probably would have gone the other route and mainly talked about how the whole Mama Grizzly thing is one of the stupidest things of the 21st century, so far, rather than embrace it and have big gay bear abortions with my daughter. Man, moms, right?
On 08.09.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
So I guess Sarah Palin’s Alaska didn’t get canceled?! Here’s a video of Palin, in a That Is So Sarah Sports Fleece, arriving in Homer, Alaska to shoot something for that show and getting immediately confronted by some school teacher with a giant sign that reads, “WORST GOVERNOR EVER,” which is both comical and accurate. For some reason Palin actually communicates with the woman instead of just going on her way. Probably because she is a noble and independent bear, or because the only people there babysitting her were her husband and small child Bristol. A transcript of their debate on what sort of terms regarding capital requirements and liquidity should be agreed upon at the international finance summit in Basel, Switzerland follows. (more…)
On 08.04.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
Teens these days! This past weekend America’s Mom, Bristol Palin, and Playgirl Heart-throb, Levi Johnston, ended their relationship and engagement again — about two weeks or so after it began. The engagement had been announced exactly how you’d expect someone who is solely semi-famous because of their dumb hick mom to announce their engagement — on the cover of a glossy tabloid. And fittingly, the official announcement that the relationship and engagement was off came from another sad, grocery store checkout lane magazine. Isn’t this what every self-respecting person does? (more…)
On 07.27.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
Bill Kristol seriously has THE BIGGEST crush on Todd Palin’s pig-wife, Sarah Palin. In this…thing…that he definitely gets paid WAY too much money to write, he opened his arms, and his heart, as he stumbled through the darkness and stupidity which is his own living self, searching for a singular word. One which can best describe the Conservative Agenda, which can hardly be considered a thing that actually exists. Refudiate. *cue angels singing* This is PERFECT, right?! Yeah, refudiate; that not real word that the world’s most famous playwright, Sarah Palin, came up with on Twitter when she was doing her daily Muslim bashing.
Facebook Robots Automatically Deleted Sarah Palin’s Anti-Mosque Rant for Violating Hate Speech Rules
On 07.22.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
Centuries ago, or at least it seems, Sarah Palin’s hired Facebook communicator drafted up a nice, heart warming couple of paragraphs to get Sarah a comfortable seat on the Ground Zero Sacred Christian Soil Ruination Bandwagon, stating how having a mosque basically anywhere in New York City is a crime against God and Jesus. But then thanks to this Tumblr blog/fan page/group thing and Facebook’s “abuse reporting” feature Palin’s stupid and hateful anti-Muslim post got deleted.
Now some may say that the abuse reporting feature on Facebook is automated, obviously, for they wouldn’t take the time to review however many million reports they get a day from someone typing nigger and faggot on their statuses, but I say who gives a shit, because this is hilarious, and Sarah Palin is a horrible human being. (more…)
On 07.19.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
Sarah Palin, who likes to believe she isn’t a stupid person and should remain involved in politics, posted this to her Twitter “19 hours ago” in protest of the giant community center being built a few blocks from ground zero (Christian American holy ground) which has a prayer space–much like the YMCA, we think. You will notice that in her Twitter post she uses the make believe organization of letters which form “refudiate” which isn’t a word at all. What does Sarah have to say about her illiteracy? (more…)
Will Sarah Palin Save These Grizzly Women from the Frightening Blacks When She is Elected President?
On 07.08.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
TODAY, Sarah Palin released a mighty wonderful/sappy video, brought to you by her giant scam fund SARAH PAC, to show you that she is a woman and a mother. This automatically makes all women and mothers love her lots. If that wasn’t frightening enough it also looks an awful lot like an I’m Running For President LOL video. I’ve listed below some of the things it does and does not contain. Maybe it will save you some time/respect for yourself. (more…)
On 07.06.10, In Uncategorized, By Matt Markezich
I learned something after watching this video: sex is literally the last thing that comes to my mind when I think about Sarah Palin. Maybe it’s because there isn’t a shallow bone in my entire body (eh? eh? ladies?), or maybe it’s cause Sarah Palin is not an attractive woman? OH, WHO CAN SAY FOR SURE?!
Anyway, this dude is just straight sportin’ wood/having a boner/being erect from standing next to Sarah Palin, who looks immaculately fake and separate from reality. In fact, that could very well be an animatronic cardboard cutout. (more…)